Despite the best efforts of Sasa Curcic, football and sex haven’t had much to do with each other down the years. Players sometimes compare scoring a goal to the physical act of love – “scrambling it in that consolation goal from a yard against Villa gave me an even bigger thrill than when I splattered my beans up ‘er indoors, Des” – and there was that recurring childhood dream we had about Micky Quinn as a Page 7 fella, wearing only a thong and a roguish grin. Then came Dimitar Berbatov. There is much talk of the footballer as athlete, footballer as artist and footballer as complete tosser; Berbatov is the first footballer as sexual entity. His career has been one big slice of Berbarotica. If he ever does an autobiography, it should be called Fifty Shades of Dimitar.
In the Premier League, Berbatov has been a lover among fighters, his sensual stylings in total contrast to the frantic panting elsewhere on the pitch. Berbatov would rather take your breath away than his own. He is proof that you can do it with your clothes on after all. His first touch is not safe for work and makes adults go so weak that their knees start chattering like a pair of comedy dentures. He does not so much control the ball as seduce it into his instep.
When Manchester United beat Manchester City in 2009, their second goal was scored spectacularly from 20 yards Carlos Tevez. Yet the whole thing would not have been possible had Berbatov not effortlessly killed a 70-yard punt before laying it off to Tevez. Nobody remembered Berbatov’s part. It’s a travesty. Any hairy-arsed chancer can oaf one in from long range; only a few players in the world can do what Berbatov did. Only one man can do it with such irresistible languor.
Modern society, never mind modern football, does not deserve Berbatov. Scott Murray of the Guardian describes him as an “existential striker”. He should have been one of the 18th century’s principal liberal thinkers, spending his days teaching tantra, listening to rabid Peruvian jazz, smoking gossamer cigarettes and inducing shuddering orgasms from 40 paces with nothing more than a barely perceptible eyebrow movement.
He is a man of principle, too, who took his disgusting ostracism at Manchester United with a silent dignity that was in total contrast to the endless bleating of modern footballers. He is Gary Cooper with a twist. In years to come, as football goes from worse to even worse, people will wonder: whatever happened to Dimitar Berbatov, the strong, silent, erotic type?
————-
This article is taken from The Surreal Football Magazine #2: Die Harder which is available £4.12. Buy from Amazon or send £4 to surrealfootball[at]gmail[dot]com via paypal and they’ll send you the PDF.
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Loved Berbatov when he was our player.
Really pleased he won stuff with us, and the golden boot for himself.
Absolute quality. Happy that he is at a club that appreciates him more than we did.
Someones trying way too hard.
“disgusting ostracism” Erm righto.
To be honest.. Berbatov at his best was a better sight than the messis and the ronaldos of this world
.. A footballer plyin his trade at the wrong era !!
The reality is? he failed to deliver, PPL can look at he small details, but he failed over that time period to deliver the goods. Look at the difference RVP has made, scoring goals, covering ground, making assists. The reality is? he did not live up to the 30 million pound price tag, yes he was our highest scorer in the 2010/11 season, but over a whole season he did fade away
fergie is the boss
The reality is RVP has been at this club for a couple of months and thouh doing the business right now he is not doing anything Berbatov didn’t do before him.So it’s a bit premature to talk about price tags and whether someone is living up to their’s.
Feck me are we gonna have another 6 million comment thread about the pros and cons of Dimitar Berbatov?
Very likely it’s a long time till Uniteds game and we need something to entertain usmeanwhile.
Berba you sexy beast…
If I had 30 million quid, I’d buy Berbatov too, but not for footballing purposes, just to put him on display as the coolest mother fucker around. I’d ask him to host a late night talk show and interview other (inferior) cool mother fuckers from around the world. Al Pacino and Cantona would be his first show guests. Just saying, SAF couldn’t make him work at United but he was stuck on football. Berbatov would captivate audiences…..just sitting there…..looking cool as fuck.
The writer is his wife feeling guilty after an affair. This beats flowers.
If a tree falls and no one hears it does it make sound? If he was that good he would have made his name, he had nice strengths but also weaknesses and mentally not the right type. He is like that girl in a window who dances well and entices you in and then you find out its a man.
He looks like Burns from the Simpsons. He should be running a nuclear plant.
berba is class end of story
Berba should be remembered fondly by all fans, he definitely was one of the most interesting and talented footballers we’ve ever had. Too bad for the first two years of his United career, people were more interested with the goal tally vs. price tag, the latter of which for sure was none of his fault, but i do miss seeing his silky touch and his demeanour. Now that he’s at Fulham, his class is clear to see because he’s a step up from everyone. But all things come to an end and we can;t exactly complain about the striker who replaced him now can we?
One other thing, the fact that he had a falling out with Sir Alex shouldn’t play too much on people’s minds. Other players we still worship went through the same thing, and they’ll probably clear the air between them one day like others have. This isn’t a Tevez-like situation, where that cunt really thought he could use Fergie as an excuse to go get 30 pieces of silver from Man City. How fucking stupid did he think we are???
Don’t worry Dela mate. He’s fondly remembered by United fans.
Brilliant article.
http://www.manutd.com/en/News-And-Features/Football-News/2012/Dec/sir-alex-ferguson-looking-forward-to-real-madrid-game-and-cristiano-ronaldo-reunion.aspx
SAF about Ronaldo
Main points were for me, so people should understand the Ronaldo thing.:
“One thing for sure is he’ll get a great reception when he comes to Old Trafford – and quite rightly. After that, they can boo as much as they like!”
and
“He always had a hankering to go to Real at some point in his career and we helped him. I don’t think it’s disloyalty as I got another year out of him when he wanted to go.
“He honoured that and did fantastically that year, so he went with our blessing, really. My way of looking at it is we were lucky to have him for six years and the fans will share that.”
the man was morbidly treated near the end of his time with United and the fact that people can overlook a man of his class and dismiss him disgusts me – some even call themselves United fans.
fuck off.
Dimitar Berbatov. always fondly remembered, always welcome. just don’t score against us ffs!
Before I was half-way through this article, I could already tell it was written by Rob Smyth, the writer who invented the term “Berbarotica”.
I miss the Berba, I really do. I am very sad that it didn’t work out for him at United. I always thought the problem was an inability of him and Rooney to read each other. There was no chemistry between them. When you have an unpredictable thinker like The Berb, and an unpredictable mover like Rooney, they have to be able to read each other almost instinctively. What makes such players so difficult for defenders is that they’re unpredictable — you’re never quite sure what angles and lines they’ll run, what tricks and turns they’ll, or where and how they lay the ball off.
When your attack is built around one such player, the others can learn to feed off him. But when it is built on two such players, they must have that chemistry between them. And Rooney and The Berb didn’t. I don’t blame either of them for that, just a fact of life.
Rooney and RVP are a different story. They seem to read each other just fine, and we can all see the results of that.
Rob Smythe?Is he not the bloke who has done article after article since 05 about United’s downfall? Had to laugh at that fat duck Hough who on transport tonight said if Evans wasn’t at United he would be somewhere like QPR. Yeah great logic you fat cunt. Durham “Scholes is nowhere near the player of Vista and Fabregas” Cannot believe these clowns get paid.
Fucking phone. “fat cunt gough on talk sport” ;
KE hi mate i was listening to that this morning,Durham actually changed his mind in regards to Evans initially said he wasn’t top quality then figured would be a better choice than Luiz at the rent boys and would fit well along side Kompany and would have no issue’s playing for Le Arse so in the end rated him as one of the best backs in the league.Saying Scholes was overrated just fucking stupid,that’s the reason England sucked shit all those years by not building the team around him
A talented player, of course. He sort of reminded me of Cantona, except with a little less work rate. But let’s be honest, flashes of brilliance aside, when the going got tough, Berbatov got going, unlike Eric who relished the challenge. So basically, we could have done what we did and stuck to Rooney being the main man, or tried ot build the team around him and be13th in the league like Fulham. Which one would you rather?
GC that’s just not true mate,the year Utd won 19 Berba carried the team while Rooney was going through contract issues,he was scoring goals for fun and would’ve won the golden boot by miles if Sir Alex hadn’t decided to play Rooney and Hernandez,Rooney was shit for most of that season and without Berba Utd wouldn’t have won 19
One thing he did prove that year he was a world class striker capable of leading the line at a top class club,no one can argue that because the football and goals he produced were top quality
So please just don’t write stupid shit and compare his role at Fulham with that at Utd like comparing chalk and cheese.thanks
Easy there wayne. That would have been a very good point were it not for that last “write stupid shit” comment/insult. Calm down and breathe… Now, yes, he did produce some great goals and his goals did get us important points, but you can’t argue that he went missing in big games. That could have something to do with the quality we had in the team at that time or the way we play, but still, scoring 5 goals against Blackburn does not a world class striker make, you have to produce that in top of the table games and Champions’ League ties as well. Again, he produced moments of briliance but he could not maintain that form throughout the whole season. Testament to that is, as you say, the use of Rooney and Chicharito in detriment of him, because Sir Alex saw that, class aside, a little more is needed to guide United. I mean, this is a guy who has openly said he doesn’t like running! Sound like a United Legend to you? come on. BTW, we can have differences but we can discuss them. Save the in fighting for Balotelli, mate
Wayne. Hey up pal. Ha I heard that. He concluded that he WOULD improve City Chelsea and Arsenal. The idiot can’t even make his mind up. Good to see fucking Redknapp already tapping up Anelka. Cunt
Agree with the Scholes comment too, though, wayne. Trying to shoehorn Gerrard and Lampard instead of using Scholes was a DAMN mistake. Served us well, though
GC Rooney should never have played in front of Berba that season he didn’t deserve to and this went missing in big games is just fucking nonsense hat trick against the Dippers,mate that’s about as big as it gets.He should never have been left out of the CL squad Utd needed him so badly that night because we didn’t have anyone to hold the ball and bring others into play just kept coming back.I’m on record one of the worst decisions of Sir Alex’s career on so many levels and i’ll tell you something else last year Berba should never have been 4th choice and if he’d have been given more games Utd would’ve had 20
Please don’t feed me with the 5 goalds against Blackburn bollocks your just rehashing old talking points with no substance.Berba was superb that year simple as,wasn’t going to comment on this thread but posters like you make me angry because you do talk nonsense and i have to call it the way i see it
Berbatov is a class player but it never worked out well for him at Man Utd. The chemistry was never right and he did seem to try to hard. RVP has only been with the club for a few months, but I’m afraid to say he has already had a bigger impact. Berbatov hardly ever turned up or scored against the top teams. RVP has already scored against Liverpool, Chelsea, Arsenal and Man City. I know he won a golden boot but the reality is that he faded away and scored in big burst, like 5 goals against Blackburn. The season ended with him being left out of the CL final squad, hardly legendary stuff.
I thin that “erotic” is going a little too far!
Can’t we just say that we love him as a footballer?
Wayne…hmmm….Kuyt scored a hat-trick against us too. Bestest Liverpool player ever? NO. And before you get you knickers in a twist, no, I’m not comparing Kuyt to Berba, just that the point you’re making is quite unsubstantiated in itself if you consider the Blackburn point nonsense as well. I don’t think Berbatov is bad, FAR from it. His first touch was something to behold, but he was probably just not suited to the United way of playing. Building the team around him would’ve meant changing to a more posession based lower tempo game, which could’ve been brilliant, but could’ve been too difficult to drill into the ethos of the teams Sir Alex has tried to create. But ok, I get you’re a Berba fan. I think we all were. But don’t let that blind you to the fact that we never really found a sustainable position for him in the team. That year he did play some amazing football, but you know who also was a hell of a player? Riquelme. And Riquelme in a United shirt would’ve been a fucking disaster. Berba was/is a class player, but not suited to the United way. Ask Sir Alex.
GC no you said Berba went missing in big games don’t you consider the Dippers a big game? i personally think their shit but it’ll always be a big game. Don’t even understand the Kuyt analogy has nothing to do with your assessment that Berba never showed up in big games,so i guess that’s a red herring
See this is what i’ve a real problem with all this shit about he didn’t fit,he was to slow yadda,yadda, fucking yadda,is all bullshit and has no basis,fuck me he proved he fit the year Rooney had his problems.Tell you what King Eric is a well respected poster ask him how good Berba was that year
This is my problem your making arguments on things that don’t exist because Berba has already proven himself ,never seen your name before so don’t know if you’re a troll or wum but you’re just talking shit because Berba did prove himself as a quality striker at Utd
Sorry Giles i hope you understand what i’m up against
KE fucking ‘arry what is the deal i don’t get why he’s rated, completely destroyed clubs by his overspending and won 1 trophy in his whole career,had that bank account offshore under his dogs name and doesn’t get busted for tax evasion WTF.
I wanted QPR to go down this year after the fuckers folded and cost us the title,what i’m hoping now ‘arry spends another 20-30 mill and the cunts still go down
Yep, I don’t comment much. So fuck my opinion, then? Still, OF FUCKING COURSE he was quality. His second or third in that game was an overhead kick, I think. That’s not the point. He carried us through the Rooney debacle,true, but would you rather we kept Berbatov instead of now having Rooney or Van Persie? Also, in the first Barcelona final, Berba played and did the square root of fuck all, so I fail to see how he would have been our saviour in Wembley. I guess what I’m trying to say is he’s good, and was good in that season, but he was never really used in a consistent way that suited him. So what good is a quality player to us if we can’t use him? Veron was class in Italy and showed moments of brilliance at United, but at the end of the day he came and went and everyone just kind of shrugged.We need players that adapt to us instead of ones that need the team to adapt to them, except in the most extremely talented of cases. Sadly, this was not the case with Berbatov.
@ GC – I agree. He was not the right fit or good enough for United, who would people swap him with, we have the best 4 set of strikers in the world. Rooney and RVP and Kagwa are better No 10′s, Welbeck pretty good too. His chemistry with team mates was poor always flapping his arms and complaining on the pitch, with RVP you don’t see that, it just clicks with him and other players and he lifts their game.
People who say SAF treated him badly are sad bastards and traitors. SAF picks the best teams. Rooney is just better than Berbatov and offers more, they never clicked as an attacking unit and Rooney has played selflessly with Ronaldo, RVP et al. So as a striker his partnerships with others did not work. SAF saw that, when he benched Berbatov the Pea-Rooney partnership took fire, he could not end that, he is not stupid. Also Pea is the future as is Welbeck and they earner their chance and linked well with Rooney. Berbatov was paid £100,000 a week, that is not bad treatment, he was not getting played in his second last year, he could have left for regular football, he knew the score then that he was not a first choice. He chose to stay and fight for a place, he lost. United is competition at the top level, good players fall by the wayside while the truly great are forged. He was treated well. He was paid well. Both sides ended it respectfully, so who are these bloody mugs having a go at SAF for mis-treating him, stupid morons, you are not managers for a reason and you are traitors.
GC in the first CL final Berba came on with 20 mins left really don’t have to say anymore just shows what a fucking idiot or WUM you really are you daft cunt just showed yourself up
NBI you’ve hated him since day one your opinion of Berba fits into the category of fucking idiot.Honestly when you first came on here spewing your hatred had you pegged for a troll only because you still post after so many years made me change my mind
Your opinions on Berba are so fucked up figure he must have shagged your wife
Oh, and he did SOOOOO much in those 20 minutes, didn’t he? How many games did Solskjaer win for us with similar playing time? Oh, sorry, maybe you don’t remember him. Your Berba-tinted glasses have made you forget who the true legends are
You know what? No, I take that last comment back. That was over the line and I really had no intention of getting into it with anyone. You have your view on Berbatov and I do mine. No reason to try to convince anyone otherwise becuse we’ll be here all night and not go anywhere.
GC are you fucking mental. don’t even go with who i remember probably been a fan longer than you’ve been born,none of your arguments have made any sense full of contradictions and mistakes,now your trying to switch it again by suggesting i’m a fair weather fan and don’t even know who Ole is? fuck off you stupid cunt not in my league mate.Can’t even have any kind of fun with you because you make no sense
Yeah your so right Utd didn’t win the first CL final because Berba didn’t do fuck all in 20mins fucking nonsense
Sure, wayne. You are the master of all things United and I apologise for DARING to think differently about a FORMER player who is no longer relevant to the team. OH, ALMIGHTY WAYNE!! SPARE ME FROM THY OVER-THE-INTERNET WRATH!! THOU ART THE ONLY ONE WHO HENCEFORTH SHALL COMMENT ON UNITED AND THY WORD SHALL BE LAW, FROM NOW UNTIL THE ENDING OF THE WORLD! OH, VENGEFUL LORD! PLEASE FORGIVE THY SERVANT!!! That said…yeah, I really do take back that one comment, though. Not cricket.
whatever you daft cunt,talk complete nonsense about a great player try and switch it several times onto complete irrelevance,make out Berba started the CL final instead of coming on as sub,now get really stupid by suggesting i’m full of myself when all i do is speak the truth.Anyone understanding football knew exactly what Berba brought to the table that year.This all started by you making some ridiculous statement by suggesting the choice was having Berba lead the team to a 13th place when already proving himself in leading Utd to a title
Smoke and mirrors never work when all anyone has to do is read how stupid your first comment was,WUM and TROLLS are always full of bullshit and nonsense,see i can use the cap button as well
Wayne, my points were valid, just different to yours, so I guess I don’t know what I’m talking about. If that’s not being full of yourself, I don’t know what is. By the way, I said “played” not “started”. You said that had he been involved in the squad, not started, so I guess you wouldn’t have started him at Wembley either, then? See? Semantics is everything. I’d tell you to read my comments again so you can understand the real message behind it, but you seem to be more interested in “daft cunt” this and “wind up merchant” that because I don’t agree with you. Also, that first comment had to do with the fact that other teams built around Berbatov, read Tottenham and now Fulham, never really seem to do all that well. Leverkusen was good back in 2002, but they still ended up losing everything they were involved in. Admittedly we have better players that those teams, but the point is building around Berbatov was never going to be the answer because the way Sir Alex plays is very ingrained in the United style and changing all of that for Berbatov was never going to work. We tried to do that for Ruud, having the whole team play for the striker, but after the 2003 title we never got going again until we built a TEAM, not 10 men plaing for an individual. Cue your tirade of vitriol…
Jesus it did work because the season he was given his chance and led the team Utd won the league and he was brilliant so everything your saying is total shit fuck me its like talking to a brick wall.Berba led the team and Utd won the league so how can his style not fit Jesus fucking Christ just by what happened makes all your arguments ridiculous
Maybe you should go back and read the first comment you clearly said with the team built around Berba not Rooney the team would finish 13th what would you prefer that whole comment was too stupid for words and what started this whole thing
So you either back that up with proof which you obviously can’t because history has already proven that to be to inaccurate
you wasn’t basing it on his previous or future teams you were clearly basing it on Utd
Good God! For fuck’s sake! It’s like I’m insulting your mum or something! You act as though Berbatov WAS United that season! I’m not saying that he wasn’t good for the first half of the season, he was, he was OUTSTANDING, but he didn’t bloddy win the whole thing by himself, did he? Where would we have been without Chicharito getting us out of a couple of sticky situations throughout the season? You cannot justify a player by how he played for a very specific period of time, brilliant as that was, when the rest of his time at United was sub par. He had one good, admittedly amazing, half a season. What in the fuck else of note did he do while at United? Again, I don’t hate him. I liked watching him play when he turned it on, (litle flicks, bringing balls down like noone else) but he seldom did it consistently save that ONE HALF OF A SEASON. Your main argument is that he was our leader for six months or so and that without him we would not have won the title, and I’ll give you that. Credit to him. What I’m trying to say is that for the rest of his time at United, he never really clicked and that building a team around him doesn’t work IN THE LONG RUN because of previous and current evidence at other clubs. Long run, son. Not half a season.
By the way, you’re right. I did base that comment on how he played for United, which again, as a whole, was sub par. The 13th place was an over exaggeration, because if we had built around him and his form dipped, Sir Alex would have substituted him in a heart ebat. But again, that was a hypothetical situation. Was that really why you started having a go at me, because of a hypothetical situation? Based on that, prove to me that we would have won that league without Rooney. Go on then. Prove it.
Berba-tops was & is still class; there are some matches that I’d be like ‘if that was Berbatov, he’d have done this or that’; like the chance Ashley Young failed to ‘control’ at once and score when through on goal against Man City (?), but allowed it to bounce for Hart to catch.
I watched the first final again last night, and contrary to what one ‘wise’ guy posted above, SAF got the team list wrong by starting Rooney on the left with Ronaldo upfront, while Tevez and Berbatov were on the bench; that shows SAF is human afterall, capable of making mistakes -many or not. Citing Welbeck alonside Berba is just as pathetic, and Berba shoulda been introduced in the second CL final. Just like some one-on-one situations where Valencia always have problems with, Nani would come to mind then. That’s the way I remember our past players with smiles (Ruud esp, Ronaldo, Wes Brown (kick player+ball) except Tevez for his tantrums. Heinze? Maybe. Pls, let Berbatov, the ‘beautiful football’ player be…
@Wayne & GC; both of you are making points all right, but one is positive while the other is the opposite. Berbatov was never our main man upfront throughout his time at Man United except the season got a black veil over his eyes, and Berbatov was really impressive till SAF got Rooney back and Berba was automatically relegated to the bench. I always thought it was unfair, but Fergie is the coach; and that doesn’t mean I’d agree with everything he does even if I can do nothing about it.
GC mentioned the previous teams Berba played for and how they fared with him, guess SAF was blind with his obsession for Berba to not see what you highlighted (you’re better than Fergie there, innit?). Rooney playing that season doesn’t automatically mean Man United would or wouldn’t have won the league, and Berba woulda gotten up to 26 goals cos he was playing very well but for SAF. SAF knew his style before buying him, & that style fit United’s but SAF preferred a fast style of play.
In the first CL final against Barca, Barca’s possession vastly reduced when Berba came on and Tevez. Both held up the ball well, we got possesion and played better than we did for most of the game. Why not just appreciate the guy’s contributions to the success of Man United when he was there instead of castigating him for having a downside; even Rooney has, just like other players just like we’ve been playing this season…
CLASS BERBA>RONALDO
GC – you are a cunt.
Hear it. Feel it. Know it.
C . u . n . t . = GC = Cunt.
Fuck off.
wayne summed it up best at 02:42. Some people are so stupid they can’t even hide their own troll agenda.
Just a couple of points to mention.
The criticism that Berba does not turn up in big games doesnt hold water, because in many big games
United played with one only striker, and that was Rooney. Can you count any big CL games in which Berbatov played (thats why he came to United, right?). Berbatov has scored against all big sides even when he was at Spurs (many times against Chelsea and Arsenal). The Spurs team was built around him, and at United, Ferguson at least said that he would build the team around Berbatov. I remember him saying “it would be Berbatov-Rooney or Owen-Berbatov” and how Rooney “needs” a mature striker alongside him. Apparently, he ended up benching him for the sake of his ‘away’ tactics.
Saying that he has half a good season and stuff is frankly off-the-mark, since if you get benched for stupid tactics, it is quite reasonable to lose some form and so on. Over the last three years, United have played some frustrating football, and Berbatov is part of the collateral damage.
Also, Wenger must be an idiot or a stuck-up to have missed out on Berbatov in exchange for Van Persie. He would fit perfectly in at Arsenal. Not that I am complaining, just that Fulham are lucky to have a player of Berbatov’s calibre.
G.C.
Some of your points are debatable. Tottenham were built around Berbatov, and they did really well attackingly. The line-up of Berbatov, Keane, Lennon and Malbranque was really good. Defensively, there were clowns, and thats why as a whole Spurs didnt do much.
And the United style of playing that you are talking about, is no way correlated to Berba. We played fast counter attacking football only when Ronaldo was here. Without a unique player like Ronaldo (how is very fast, has deadly finishing, and does not like to defend), it is impossible and unrewarding to play counter-attack. Berbatov style is not the opposite of United’s as people make it out to be. Berbatov likes to dwell on the ball, but is also very good for one-touch passes and through balls. United did not even play that! All I can remember is a boring cross-cross to Valencia who aims a high looping cross. Very original indeed!
Ferguson bought Berbatov, but had no clue about how to use him.
Thing is when Utd needed him he led the team to 19 so i don’t need hypotheticals because Berba already proved himself,which makes your hypothetical redundant and fucking stupid that’s the reason i came after you for talking shit.It only takes a run through your posts to see contractions and attempts to bring in diversions to realize what a fucking Muppet you are
Cant help but think the Gary Cooper reference has something to do with Tony Soprano’s rants when lamenting about his emotional frailty.
“Whatever happen to the likes of Gary Cooper, the strong, silent type ?”
hehe
Square Peg/Round Hole.
No matter how the issue is debated, Dimmy was a disappointment at OT. Of course he had his moments but he was expected to be more than that – and he wasn’t.
To quote: “I knew Eric Cantona and you, sir, are no Eric Cantona”.
I do agree, though, that it was a serious mistake for SAF to leave him out of the 2nd CL match with Barcelona while giving a spot on the bench to LittleMikey. THAT was a match that Dimmy might have – maybe – been a useful addition to the on-field team.
Same goes for Nani – Barcelona sussed AV7 and closed him down- AV is a one-footed player (a bit of a flat-track bully against inferior oppostion) who always does the same two tricks as opposed to a two-footed player who has a bag-of-tricks that may (or may not) work against top-class opponents.
Berba’s career at United was a failure.
Many people point to the season he joint top scored in the league but we all know (or should) those goals came in clumps.
He never suited our style of play but failing that he failed to show willing. The will to get the ball, shoot and make runs into the box.
He was more happy dropping deep playing passes and doing flicks. NOOOO ! ! !.
No matter how they came, his goals in 10-11 did help secure a record breaking title. And for that alone, his time at United was anything but a failure. I think we’ve forgotten what a failure at United looks like.
Costas @ 21:28: ” his goals in 10-11 did help secure a record breaking title. And for that alone, his time at United was anything but a failure.”
You are correct – but he was a “disappointment”.
He promised so much and, in relative terms, delivered little.
BUT, as you say, he did make a significant contribution to # 19 and, for that reason alone, it would be incorrect to label his time @ UTD as a “failure”.
The contrast with RVP is quite telling – not so much in terms of goals scored but in relation to fitting in with the team’s style of play.
@denton
Wouldn’t say he promised anything to be honest. Players often look different when they join United compared to their previous club. Berbatov left a team where he was the focal point to join another team where his role would be different. Won’t even get into the transfer fee debate because we all know how that came about. Obviously he wasn’t a rousing success at United, but I’d say he was a victim of circumstances (weak midfield led to 4-5-1 selections, Rooney was the main striker, our play needed to be quicker) more than a disappointment.
You mentioned Cantona. While it’s impossible to compare players from different ages, I truly feel that Cantona would have faced the same types of problems in today’s game. That’s why in my opinion he retired prematurely. He realized technique was beginning to come second in terms of requirements.
Costas – I only mentioned Eric Cantona insofar as he was a charismatic player and the BerbaLovers (those who claim to have Berba-gasms) seem to think that Dimmy was “cool” or “sexy”.
That’s why I riffed/quoted the Dan Quayle put-down by Lloyd Bentsen, who was a US vice-presidential nominee. Bentsen said, with withering contempt, in his televised debate with Quayle (who had claimed that he [Quayle] was “like JFK”) something similar to: “I knew Jack Kennedy. Jack Kennedy was my friend. And you, sir, are no Jack Kennedy”.
I understand if the reference is arcane and now rather old (and I, sir, am no American although I am rather old) but it does get to the absurdity of comparing Dimmy’s “cool sexiness” with Eric’s charisma and ability to deliver in the clutch.
Eric Cantona was the real deal; whether he liked it or not, Dimitar Berbatov was not. It’s not a matter of Dimmy’s claim to be the second coming of Cantona but, rather, the absurdity of the claims by those who admired Dimmy that he was a truly-special player.
Like J-S Veron, when push-came-to-shove, Dimmy, in his four years at UTD, wasn’t good enough to be considered UTD-quality. He wasn’t an unmitigated disaster but, for sure, Dimmy was not a “rousing success at United”. And, at the end of the day, that’s what counts – it’s all about results.
AJ @ 19:24: “To be honest.. Berbatov at his best was a better sight than the messis and the ronaldos of this world”
This is, I think, a perfect example of insanity by Berba-gasm.
@denton
Yeah but could you say for sure that Cantona wouldn’t have struggled in today’s game? Or that Berbatov wouldn’t have been a better fit for United 15-20 years ago? That was my point. Never compared the two, although as far as comparisons go, Berba’s cool and sexy (depending on your taste, lol) style was more similar to Cantona than say, Van Persie.
And to continue with the quotes, I’d say Berba was the type of stiker we deserved, but not the one we needed during that time.
Denton … how are you, old mate? Still can’t resist the opportunity to stick the boot in to the Berba-lovers, eh?
“This is, I think, a perfect example of insanity by Berba-gasm.” For sure, it was. But to me, it’s insanity to talk about “the best” in almost any area of human endeavour. Doesn’t stop people doing it. Clearly, Messi and Ronaldo are better players than Berbatov. Yet for all that, there are aspects of Berbatov’s play that were, well, yes, Berba-gasmic. Few players have matched his extraordinary abillity to tame even the most difficult of balls instantly with a single, silky touch. In fact, I doubt even Ronaldo can match that aspect of Berbatov’s play (though Messi can). And he did score (and set up) some goals with jaw-dropping skill and inventiveness. Are we better off with RVP? Of course.
But in all my long years of watching United from a distance, there are many moments of individual and team magic whose memory I will always treasure. And I quite happily confess that Berbatov is one of the leading contributors to that “gallery” of special moments in my head.
@DC
You lost all argument credibility the moment you compared Berbatov’s role to Solskjaer’s.