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This is how it feels to be City… XXIII

Following Manchester City’s defeat to Real Madrid thanks to a last minute Cristiano Ronaldo goal, blue hero Sergio Aguero revealed to journalists in the Spanish capital that the only reason why he went to City was because he had no choice.

“If Madrid had wanted me, I would be playing here,” he said. “I had no choice but to sign with Manchester City. I never said that I wouldn’t play with Real Madrid because I didn’t want to betray Atletico.”

About Scott

Scott is the editor of Red Matters - 50 Years of Supporting Manchester United and an author of Play Like Fergie's Boys and Not Nineteen Forever. He writes for ESPN, The Metro and Bleacher Report. Follow @R_o_M on Twitter.

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  1. Vinkz says:

    Haha Typical Citeh!

  2. mocthezuma says:

    We should have bought him. I have always liked Aguero, until he signed for City.

  3. belfast red. says:

    Hahahahaha! Sums up the majority of their team. Theres no soul. Just a bunch of mercenaries. I knw afew bitterz cant wait 2 bring this up next time i see them lol

  4. TonyBee says:

    Blokes a complete cunt

  5. gazzer says:

    I like him a lot more than other players like Tevez, DeJong, Balotelli, Suarez, Terry, etc.
    He did embarrass them though

  6. mara says:

    Who give a damn…guy play great…he can think whatever he wants until he is playing good…- something like that Mo said about Ronaldo….
    maybe some our players think the same way, but wont say, he is jist honest…

  7. belfast red. says:

    Just thinkn bout this. If 1 of our players said that id be fuckin raging with them. Not what you want, 1 your star players to be making statements like that… Hahahaha.

  8. belfast red. says:

    Thinking whatever u want and coming out with a statement to the press are 2 totally different things. Theres a time and a place to say something like that. And just after being beatin by them was not it. Fuck aguero! Wouldnt want him near United.

  9. gerkeo says:

    bottom line, his goal won them the league, i dont think city fans really give a piss if their players care for the club, their squad is one of mercenaries.

  10. phealens tash says:

    typical plastic bluenose

  11. Costas says:

    Always a classic.

  12. rory says:

    Heart and Soul of Citeh right there!

  13. utd_fc says:

    well who can blame him. I would choose a big club over a small one too :P

  14. Mozza79 says:

    Who cares? Really? Is it seriously a surprise or a knock on City that Aguero would have signed for Real Madrid if they’d wanted him? Why would that surprise anyone? Is it also a surprise that the only other club at the time with the resources to pay his fee and wages and who needed a world class striker was City? The rest of the “This is how it feels” series are funny, this is just small time.

  15. Nitram says:

    So Aguero’s a prisoner at City, practically a slave. Where’s Blatter when you actually need him?

  16. Utd4life says:

    Good player but that’s just a daft thing to say.

  17. utd will never die says:

    Disrespecting the club someone plays for is hardly smalltime and that is City’s problem
    No pride,class or history just money.Any fan who sees no problem with that statement is as plastic as the player saying it

  18. Clint-Iamyourpapii says:

    Emile Heskey has joined Newcastle Jets – Aussie League team.

    :cry: sad news, the legend will be passed from generation to generation.

    “There once was a being so talented he deliberate helped the opposition out of sympathy. No one man was capable of the selflessness he possessed in his arsenal, it was his greatest asset, when all hope was lost, Heskey would restore a dying spark to it’s roaring flame of old by an act of brilliance and mercy – he would simply do the most basic act in Doing Nothing”.

    What a Man !


  19. va7encia says:

    hate citeh but always liked aguero and yaya toure!! we should have signed them aguero last minute winner has our dna all over it and toure could have been our keane. oh well fuck them, hopefully PETRUCCI will soon be given a chance and step up

  20. utd_fc says:


    Heskey has never missed a penalty, Messi has
    Heskey has 61 caps for England, Messi has 0.
    Heskey has scored 7 goals for England, Messi has 0.
    Heskey has scored 100+ goals in the Premier League, Messi has never scored in it.
    Heskey undoubtedly has a larger cock than Messi.
    Heskey is black, Messi isn’t.
    Heskey’s feet are size 15, Messi’s are a tiny size 10.
    Emile’s shots go out for throw-ins, Messi’s don’t.
    Heskey’s bitch is sexier than Messi’s bitch.
    Heskey misses a lot because he doesn’t want to upset the goalkeepers feelings, Messi just scores all the time because he’s a twat.
    Heskey has played in more World Cups than Messi.
    Emile has played for more clubs than Messi, meaning he is more versatile.
    Heskey has been bought for bigger transfers fee than Messi ever has.
    Heskey quite clearly has a better haircut than Messi.
    Messi played shit in the Champions League Semi Final against Chelsea, Heskey didn’t.
    Heskey has never had a bad game in La Liga, Messi has.
    Heskey weighs much more than Messi, making him the better man.
    Heskey can play without Xavi and Iniesta.
    Heskey changes clubs regularly, as he wants to give everyone a chance with his brilliance, Messi just stays at Barcelona.
    Heskey has better strength, heading accuracy and aggression on FIFA 12 (the only attributes that matter).
    Heskey has played more times in the Euro’s than Messi.
    Messi has never made a girl orgasm, Heskey does by simply staring into a womens eyes.
    Heskey’s middle name is ‘William Ivanhoe’, which is far better and cooler than Messi’s middle name ‘Andrés’.
    Heskey has had shit managers such as Alex Mcleish and Steve Bruce, whereas Messi has had Pep Guardiola
    Heskey can play at Centre Back, Messi can’t

    HESKEY ;)

  21. Clint-Iamyourpapii says:


    Safe to say Messi won’t achieve half the stuff Heskey has in two lifetimes as a footballer.

    In the upcoming premier league fixtures, there should be a minutes applause for Heskey in every stadium, however it may need to be abandoned at Anfield due to fears Luis Suarez may refuse to clap .


  22. samuel - united WE stand says:

    For all the crap heskey gets, he’s still achieved all his targets as a footballer.

  23. utd_fc says:

    Just look at the curl on that ball.

  24. Clint-Iamyourpapii says:

    If Heskey had a tweeter account, for sure he’d be one of the most followed men in the world.

  25. Proverb says:

    This ;)

  26. Proverb says:

    It could be a lot worse Emile … at least you’re not Ashley Cole

    A prisoner on Death Row in Utah has been allowed to choose his firing squad. He has chosen Heskey.

    The England football team go to a theatre in Cape Town to relax. Suddenly Emile gets up and walks on to the stage.

    Fabio Capello shouts, “Heskey! What are you doing up there?” Heskey replies, “Doing what you said boss. Holding up the play.”

    Emile gets a part-time job at a zoo and the keeper, aware of the striker’s reputation for a lack of pace, tells him to take care of the tortoises.

    Later the keeper pops to see how Emile is doing and finds him standing by an empty enclosure, sobbing. “Where have all the tortoises gone?” asks the keeper. Emile shrugs and says: “I just opened the door and whoooossh!!!”

    It’ll be nice for Emile when he weds Chantelle Tagoe. It’ll make a change to hear “Mrs Heskey” instead of “Heskey misses”.

    Emile plans to open a pub when he retires – because he’s great at putting shots over the bar.

    Today in England training, Heskey’s 1,000 shots all hit the net. Shame they were playing tennis.

    What’s the difference between the BP oil spill and Heskey? The oil spill posed a threat to the United States.

    A fan was chuffed when he got Emile’s autograph after a match. The next week, he accosted him again and got another signature.


    After the following game he tried to get it again. Heskey said, “This is the third time you’ve asked for my autograph. What’s going on?” “Well,” said the man, “If I get eight more of yours I can swap them for one of Wayne Rooney’s.”

    A Nigerian player arrived at Aston Villa. During training the manager kept saying: “Foot, ball, goal – foot, ball, goal,” while pointing at his foot, the ball then the goal.

    The Nigerian said: “Don’t speak so slowly, I speak perfect English.” Then the manager told him, “I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to Emile.”

    Robert Green faced over 100 shots in training today without conceding a goal. Tomorrow, he and Heskey will train with the rest of the squad.

    A spectator got into the England dressing room after the England v Algeria game. A few unsettling minutes passed before the team realised it was just Emile.

    The new Emile Heskey Subbuteo playing piece was released today and the likeness is uncanny — especially that big block of concrete around his feet.

  27. T. says:

    Everything here cracks me up. The City mentality and the nice things said about Heskey! =)

    Sweden has always been afraid of England when we met in Euros, world cup or just an unnecessary international cap. Media called it “heroics” everytime when we won or got a draw…and we always did until the day Heskey retired from the 3 kittens.

  28. Kagawa The Shirt-seller says:

    Kolo Toure set to be a 500million player when he is sold to Qatari side in January. UEFA Fair Play declares Shitty is a profitable club. hahahaha

  29. Utd4life says:

    Cannot wait for Sunday. It’s gonna be a high intensity, high tempo game and I hope we are up for it because I cannot stand another defeat at Anfield. I am pretty sure Giggsy is going to start since he did not play in the CL game and we all know that the Gaffer likes to have one of the 2 elder statesman to start in big games. L’pool are going to be well up for it and I hope we don’t get run over again.

  30. Costas says:

    European football is a lot poorer now that Heskey has left it. :(

  31. Bobby Charlton's combover says:

    Utd_fc and Proverb – some great laughs to kickstart the day.

    A billionaire gives his kid Man Utd for christmas and tells him – ‘you know son, that’s the best Christmas present in the world’. ‘Why’s that dad asks the wee lad’? to which his father replies……..’because it can’t be beaten’

  32. wiuru says:

    On topic . The vast majority of Cash and carrys players are there for the Money .Success is also helping keep them .They have announced this new state of the art academy .Enhanced seating capacity at the Emptyhad , Their so called fans have every right to feel elated . Our task at every level of our club is to overshadow them in everything . I do not believe for one minute mcfc are reponsible for team mansours success .But, like it or not it reflects on them .Tevez would of been long gone had someone been willing to pay his wage .Aguero etc will go if the right clubs and money are offered them. Again its down to us to to ensure they never realise what they are out to achieve .

  33. wiuru says:

    Why the digs at Heskey ? he never did anything to hurt us lol .

  34. Proverb says:

    Emile Heskey (England) 59 caps, 7 goals.

    Rene Higuita (Colombia) 68 caps, 8 goals.

    Jose Luis Chilavert (Paraguay) 74 caps, 8 goals.

    Unlucky Emile, the other two are goalkeepers…

  35. Proverb says:

    What do you get if you cross a ball and Emile Heskey?

    A goal kick.

  36. Proverb says:

    Emile Heskey has revealed that he’s been wearing a t-shirt under his top ever since his last goal and will show it off next time he scores.

    It says “Free Nelson Mandela”

  37. utd_fc says:

    Robin Van Persie has been assigned penalty duties in the absence of Wayne Rooney.

  38. Diego says:

    Well about time someone is assigned to do something. Kids 10-years and younger know who the penalty taker is in the team, somehow it got overlooked at Man utd. We probably don’t train a lot these days, you know just to avoid getting injuries and all…

  39. DreadedRed says:

    utd_fc – good morning sir!

    Who has said that RVP has been assigned penalty duties in the absence of Wayne?

    Sir Alex said yesterday: ” I thought Robin should have taken it, to be honest with you. I think we will have to decide before the game, which is my fault, I should have done that.”

    Is it perhaps that quote that your statement is based on, or was something else also said?

  40. DreadedRed says:

    Ben Amos (22) has featured in every minute of Hull City’s impressive start to their campaign, leaking just five goals in six Championship games. Steve Bruce says:

    “It’s a big year for Ben. It’s all right having potential, which he’s got bags of, but it’s all about getting games and experience now. We knew he was a very competent goalkeeper, you’re not at Manchester United without having that ability. He can be pleased with the start he’s had here and the more games he plays, the better he will become I’m sure.”

    “The England under-21s cap will help him along with that and that’s why he’s here, to step up his development. He’s enjoying the challenge of playing regular first-team football and I’m very pleased with him. The one weapon a manager has is competition for places. It’s Ben who is the front runner at the minute but the challenge is there for all the goalkeepers.”

  41. redbilly says:

    Personally I like Aguero. Good professional. I agree with some that such a statement on record is in bad taste for his club. if , in fact its true /not misinterpreted.

    It goes without saying he would have prefered madrid. Why would any world class player opt for a relatively unknown club like city if not for the money. He’s stating the obvious really .

    I doubt many City fans will be offended. Hardly in the kettle neck catagory of insults and he was forgiven.

  42. redbilly says:

    Belfast red_ you are right . If a United player made such a statement I too would be livid, most fans would be. I think city fans realise they are only there for the cash not the history or respect the club holds. In many ways , city deserved more respect before the influx of cash. At least the majority of fans where true fans, as is the case at any small time club that win nothing.

  43. FletchTHEMAN says:

    City…. a club put on earth to be laughed at!

    Thanks, Kun! Knock yourself out. :lol: :lol: :lol:

  44. redbilly says:

    Fletch- its like the ripper being freed and winning the euro millions. Plenty of talent would be heading his way.

  45. Zulu-Utd-Malta says:

    I’v always tried to explain to people that there is no history and no culture at City. They live only today, tomorrow we’ll see.
    No body knew that there was another football club in Manchester bcoz before Mansour took over this joke club they were a Sunday mornig pub club
    What a contrast last Tuesday eh. Real Madrid, rich in thier history and culture and then City went out on the pitch……. The residue of English football and I started laughing ! :)

  46. LoneStarRed says:

    I have missed this topic! City, first choice for no one.

  47. LoneStarRed says:

    Wow. Mind boggling how much of a diss that is to City. Really. The timing, the occasion…..ugly. Another reminder that no one really thinks City equals history or big club, more like get the money while I can. I suppose Ahnzi was his next choice.


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