“An emergency helpline for despondant United fans has been set up, following their defeat at the weekend,” a witty scouse bird said on the news on Radio 1. “So for any fans who are feeling the pain following their game against Liverpool, get in touch on 0800 41 41 41.” Chortle.

There seems to be some confusion though as if anyone needs a hotline, surely it is the scousers. I would suggest the same number be used.

0800 4(points behind) 1 (game in hand) 41 41.”

The RoM 2016-17 Season Preview is available for just £5. It includes an EXCLUSIVE interview with Mikael Silvestre, a Q&A with the country's top journalists about our transfer targets, articles by brilliant United writers, and so much more. All profit goes to Trafford Macmillan so please support this fantastic cause.