Didier Drogba is just one of those players you love to hate. Long before Cristiano Ronaldo became public enemy number one, Drogba inspired hatred from all around the country. He’s over six feet tall, he is well built, yet threw himself to the ground, crying like a little bitch, whenever the opportunity arose.

It was rather pleasing when Drogba got himself sent off in the Champions League final then. Whilst I would have enjoyed seeing John Terry or Frank Lampard receiving their marching orders more, Drogba is still a great candidate to fuck up his team’s European Cup hopes. With the game almost certainly going down to penalties, you don’t want to be without your main striker, yet Drogba’s foolishness meant Chelsea were going in to the shoot out at a disadvantage.

Whilst every one is quick to blame Drogba, it’s interesting to watch the incident back, and see that something-or-nothing quickly turned in to a bit of a brawl thanks to hot-headed Terry. Ashley Cole and Carlos Tevez had an exchange of words whilst Terry was lying on the deck receiving treatment for cramp. The situation was over though, until Terry leapt up and ran over to Tevez to have a go at him. Ballack marched in then, shoving Tevez in the chest, then Lampard did the same.

From this point, players from both teams ran in to get involved, before it was all ended with a slap from Drogba. Vidic had to be held back before the referee correctly showed Drogba the red card. Just think, had Terry just let it be, there would have been no problem, Drogba wouldn’t have been sent off, Terry wouldn’t have taken one of the penalties, and Chelsea probably would have won the European Cup. Aww.

However, in Drogba’s autobiography, he claims he didn’t deserve to be sent off for slapping Vidic across the face, and now wishes he had punched him.

“I have seen the match on video and I believe I should not have been sent off with three minutes to go,” Drogba says. “If I had punched him, I would have understood. Now I wish I had. You have a lot of regrets when you go to the final and lose it. I have more regrets about losing the final than being sent off. But it wasn’t the worst feeling. Hitting the post was. I wasn’t feeling well because I was playing alone and against world-class defenders. When you get a chance like that you have to take it. Some Chelsea fans blame me for losing. I can take it but I think I gave my best, as I always do, because I want to be No.1.”

This just about sums up this odious cunt. His sending off quite probably cost Chelsea the European Cup, yet all he bloody cares about is being number one. Christ.

Regardless, for a man who is quite happy to throw himself on the floor and pretend to cry when there has been no contact whatsoever, I’m surprised to hear such fighting talk. He wishes he had punched Nemanja Vidic? Really? Someone should let him know that if he had punched Vidic, he wouldn’t be around to tell the tale…